Shallow, shallow, shallow, so much shallowness.

While cooking dinner I let my mind do some wondering. Really it wonders all the time but just for once it felt like I was in semi-control since I gave it permission.

So while it was taking it's little stroll through the tulips it noticed that I get some kind of arrogant pleasure to notice other people's flaws. You know things like, "She is so amazingly well read but as deaf as a door knob" or "They are one of the most loving families I have ever met but their house is a pig style" and the one that I absolutely get the most pleasure out of, "She is still FAT".

Yup, I went there and I go there very often. The most recent was seeing one of my neighbor ladies at the girls' school. I was attending the end of year parent volunteer brunch and saw her swoop in with her very sweet toddler in tow. She came in a very fetching summer dress with matching head band and super cute shoes. So why do I feel the need to judge her? Because she is one of those. One of those women that have to be in the clique. The ones that are masters of everything and everyone. I can handle the McGyver of all things public and domestic but the needed to rule over others makes me instantly feel full on disgust towards you. (I fart in your general direction)

As I watched her plant herself in the center of her group and watched them cackle over her like a bunch of noisy hens I realized something. I had not seen her in roughly 9 months (I know as a neighbor I really do suck) and she is just as fat as she was before. And that made me feel better some how.

I know as a big girl myself I should know better than to judge others about their weight but I couldn't help it. It was irresistible like a forbidden apple in the center of the garden. I knew I shouldn't but I did it anyway.

I will try to do better. I will notice that this person and other people as well have some many personal issues that for me to judge them on something so petty is frivolous and wrong. I will remember this lesson and become better for it.

p.s.

Girl you should of seen that floral dress she was wearing. When she turned around the flowers on her back side looked like they were straining to pop right off and runaway. Looked like two big headed kids with their faces pressed up against a window with all the force they could muster. I have never seen all the detail of a hibiscus flower until I saw it blown up to poster size.

Thank goodness I ain't Catholic. Could you imagine how many Hail Marys that would be?